Happy Fourth! What's The Under/Over On Puking?

What's more American than American Tabloid? Not Much!

Okay, maybe the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest, held every Fourth of July, but only if there's gambling involved!

Latest odds posted here. Gotta love the action.

AT fully endorses gorging oneself until sickness. We'll be right in front of the idiot box cheering for the two titans of the event, Joey Chestnut and Kobayashi, stuffing ourselves with hot dogs! Talk about life imitating art.

Now that's American, baby.

American Tabloid: The Last Michael Jackson Report.

Enough already, you degenerate voyeurs!

American Tabloid is trying to mourn the loss of MJ and not wallow in the rumors of cross dressing homosexual affairs.

Rat infested motels? Jacko, you could have met your Casanova at AT headquarters. We have (semi) clean sheets and while the rodent problem was eradicated, you would have to only endure the occasional arachnoid attack!

Johnny Depp is already preparing for the film with Tim Burton.

Sex, Lies and Videotape.

Golden Boy's political future plummets to earth faster than an Air France jetliner. Seems Johnny wasn't so good and was making a ... er ... "sex tape".

He's no Tommy Lee, but at least he's banging in the USA and not in Argentina!

American Tabloid: Jumping Through Hoops To Keep The Masses Entertained!

This guy's going to play Shaq-Fu in a game of horse later this summer. AT advice to Mr. Diesel ... start practicing right now!

Seeing Black Helicopters? You're Crazy! Yeah Right!

"Don't worry, be happy" is the mantra of the Powers That Be. NWO prepares for the worst here in downtown Los Angeles. Hang on to your hats, folks!

Blackhawks in the sky are nothing to fear.

Editor's Note: Where were they when the riots broke out last week, post-Lakers championship?-JR

JACKO IS DEADO?!?

Bubbles has not made an official statement, but TMZ is reporting Jacko is no more. "Curse of Three" continues with McMahon, Fawcett and now MJ. Rest in Peace.

Whoa!